Here I was, but where was I really? Everything had changed. And all was a blur. What I did know was that God was in control, and that He would help me.
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Psalm 23: 1-3
Numb with pain, wretched with grief, I relied on my faith to sustain me. God showed His love in so many ways!
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Psalm 23: 4
Friends and family came and did all the right things, bringing food, cleaning my house, helping with arrangements, opening their arms and their hearts. I remember sitting in my "Prayer Chair" and thinking about how, through such an awful, horrid, event, love was so evident.
You prepare a banquet for me, in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Psalm 23: 5
I did all the right things. I put on a stiff upper lip and planned the funeral. I forced myself through the necessary steps, and put up a brave front, smiling through my tears. I made sure I ate, although I could only manage one meal a day. I went to church daily -- my fogged brain couldn't take in much, I know my soul was fed.
Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Psalm 23: 6
So I stepped forward, into the wilderness. Into the land of grief, the realm of mourning.
And when the time came a few months later, I sent my son off to college.
Su
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